Old Habits & an Old Dog
They say start as you intend to go on, and I had every intention of starting this blog post in January on time. Alas, the overwhelm was real with all of the events I’m about to talk about. I found myself sliding into old territory of not getting out of bed/showering/napping even more than usual around the editing of events.
New Year, New Me. Apparently.
Can a person living with multiple disabilities make new year’s resolutions to be a new person? I believe so. There is always an opportunity to do and be better than we previously were, even when our bodies and/or minds limit us in how we go about these changes.
But before I get to January, there’s the full month of December to get through! Whilst on paper there are only three events to cover, there are multiple parts, and we begin with an adventure to Piggoreet with my support worker on the 11th Dec.
A Quiet Month Is A Good Month - Or Is It?
As I said, this was a less busy month than what I have experienced in the past. I’m not mad about it. In fact, it was exactly what was called for in my hectic life. I need to practice slowing down. My daily rests are a great start, but they are the tip of the iceberg of sorting out a comfortable living. I grew up with the “head down, bum up” mentality of the working class British, and as a British, my father taught me not to complain about it. I have been working on this. Whilst I do not complain out loud to others, I certainly have stern words with myself these days and ask myself whether or not working so hard is a value add to my life. I’m trying to practice the art of not giving a fck, but decades of poor life skills have made it a hard lesson to learn. Once again, I leave you with this – be kind to yourself, on both the easy days and the hard days. Take nothing for granted.
A Crisis of Ability
Michael drove us to Canberra for their large family get together (about 30 of us, all immediate family) to celebrate their parents 50th wedding anniversary. Whilst I’ve been married, I consider that an anomaly as I do not believe in marriage. However, to see two people working hard to stay together for so long and genuinely love each other after such a large amount of time does impress me. I realised something a few months ago about my identity
Busy Does Not Make The Body Stronger
At last chat with my GP, we discussed me possibly having Restless Leg Syndrome brought on by the trauma of suddenly losing my ma. However, I am due for another appointment on Monday as something turned up in my bloods. I am hoping this will bring relief to the chronic pain I've been suffering for the past two months.
Despite the trauma and the grief and the pain I have been busy, as is my subconscious want.
Grief is still a constant friend, but life grinds on.
There was no blog last month due to the sudden unexpected passing of my ma. My ma was my best friend, and I shared everything with her, so now to be going on adventures, stretching myself as a human being, and going through so many things, it is hard not to want to share them with her at every opportunity. There is a large gap in my life now that nothing will be able to replace (and believe me – alcohol isn’t a solution).